It is every parent’s worst nightmare, every family member or friend. The death of a loved one is often a shock, but particularly when it is a young person who has taken their own life.

A local family, bereaved by suicide, are asking questions about access to mental health services for young people who may be facing serious challenges.

The message to them is this: you are not alone and you matter. Everyone has something to bring to the world and it needs you in it.

Families who have been left behind have to deal with devastating consequences. Dawn Bennett’s daughter, Kiera, took her own life in March earlier this year whilst at University, just days from her nineteenth birthday.

Dawn is now hoping to raise awareness and stop the stigma around mental health issues – something needed now more than ever with increasing pressure on young people and the particular challenges we have all faced with a shift in the way in which we live and communicate.

She told The Journal that we should think of fixing our minds just as we would our body. “There is such an unfortunate stigma attached to mental health – even the phrase seems condemning.

“If you had other problems with your body, you would go to the doctor, but anything to do with the mind seems to be viewed differently. You are what is going on in your mind and people forget that there can be a problem with the physical brain. It’s another part of the body that can have an issue. To not talk about that or treat it with wariness or in hushed tones is simply wrong.

“The questions came thick and fast. Is it really her?

Has there been a mistake? Did she really do it? Why? What could we have done? Why didn’t we see the signs?

“You always think you would know if something was wrong, but that is not always the case.

“Since Kiera went, we have heard of so many young people who have faced similar and have mental health issues. Some say it is the pandemic – it could be, or it could be a subject that is far more common than we think and we are just not talking about it.”

In B&NES, Off the Record can help children and young people, both virtually and in person, giving guidance on a variety of issues including anxiety, bullying, eating issues, family, homelessness, school/exam stress, self-esteem, low mood and depression, suicidal thoughts, gender identity/sexuality and many more topics. They also offer advice for parents, carers, friends or anyone who may be worried about someone they know and love.

The key to it all, says Dawn, is talking about it.

“If you notice even the slightest change in a friend, relative or loved one, get them to talk. If not to you, point them in the direction of someone else, but just get them to talk. Do not go through the loss of a life because you thought they were fine and they told you so.

“Do not be afraid to intervene – it may be the help they were too scared to ask for.”

Perhaps one of the saddest things about loss by suicide is that the person is no longer able to see how much they are loved. After Kiera’s passing, friends have been in touch with the

family to pay tribute to their daughter. Jasmin Williams went to Westfield Primary with Kiera from 2006–2013 and they later met again at Norton Hill Sixth Form. When Jasmin found out about Kiera’s death, she presented her family with a painting of Kiera. The framed portrait is now in the entrance way to their house and was officially unveiled last weekend as part of a celebration of her life.

Dawn added: “We see it every day when we enter and leave the house. It means she is never far away.

“I have been making angels for years and thought that I could sell them now as Kiera Angels. I wanted to make something positive out of this. If it helps people in difficult times to find comfort, it is worthwhile. Any money I make from them we will donate to mental health charities.

"Kiera was a most wonderful daughter to me and my husband David, she cared about everyone.

"I liken her to a butterfly, she was a beautiful person, with a beautiful soul who brought light and joy to all, but her time here was all too fleeting.

"She had the potential to bring change to the world, even her teachers thought so. She was clever, but humble and was willing to give of her time and knowledge to those who needed it.

"She taught us how to see the world again as a child would and to see the best in everyone. We told her that however she saw herself, she was that most rare of people, beautiful on the inside as well as the outside and that she could be whatever she wanted.

"If she was here right now we would tell her how much she is loved by us, the rest of her family and friends. No matter what she chose to do in life, she would always have love and to believe in herself. If only she could have talked to us, I know we could have sorted things out."

There are many organisations out there who can help if you are feeling alone, in crisis or have no one to talk to:

• offtherecord-banes.co.uk for a full range of services.

• B&NES Wellbeing Service Mental Health Team: www.bathneshealth

andcare.nhs.uk Call: 0300 2470203 (Option 1) or email: [email protected]

• Childline (Under-19s): Confidential call, chat

online or email about any problem, big or small:

childline.org.uk

•CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably): 0800 58 58 58 or: thecalmzone.net Provides listening services, information and support for young men, including a web chat service.

• The Mix: Support and advice for Under-25s, including a helpline, crisis messenger service and web chat. 0808 808 4994 85258

• Papyrus: Confidential support for Under-35s at risk of suicide or others who are concerned about them: 0800 068 41 41 or text: 07786 209697. papyrus-uk.org

• Sane: sane.org.uk

Offers emotional support and information for anyone affected by mental health problems.

• Samaritans: 116 123 (freephone).

For details on Kiera’s Angels, email: [email protected]